(On the Importance of Understanding What’s Really Important)
According to a news article (entitled “Your kids should not be the most important in the family” by John Rosemond, published on January 1, 2017, in Naples Daily News) that I saw on my Facebook newsfeed, parents, not children, are the more important members of the family.
I do not and couldn’t agree with the writer’s sentiments and premises. He obviously approached the issue using a one-sided, authoritarian-oriented perspective; and even implying that children are brats, the reason they should not be given greater importance.
Using my own analysis of the issue, here’s what I have to say about what’s really important.
Basis-dependent Assessment
It depends on the basis or premise being used to determine who, between parents and children, are more important.
First, many, if not most, parents regard their children as the most important members of their respective families not because of the children’s right to a sense of entitlement. This is primarily due to the vulnerability of the children (specifically, very young children), considering that they are too young to take care of their basic needs—eating well, hygiene, security and safety against danger and other environmental or stranger threats. And in this aspect, children become important to such parents—in which, importance is being equated with attention due to vulnerability. Therefore, children are usually given more attention not because they are spoiled or demanding or selfish but because they naturally need attention, love, caring, and nurturing.
On the other hand, parents are also important because they are the ultimate providers; they have the ability to provide for the children’s and the entire family’s basic needs—such as food, shelter, security, and safety, and other emotional and financial necessities. They are also the ones who can make better decisions. And in this premise, parents become important. After all, children (in general) are not yet equipped with the capability to manage their lives and to make sound decisions.
Equally Important in Respective Ways
Therefore, the question “Who is/are the most important member/s of the family?” may be answered clearly, fairly, and properly only after having cleared up first what sense or concept of the word importance is being tackled.
In the end, neither parents nor children are really more important than the other—simply because every member of a family—be this a nuclear/traditional family, a same-gender one, or single-parent unit—is as important as the others—because each member plays or lives his/her respective role and contributes something unique, personal, and complementary to complete the harmony of the collective family.
Sa Madaling Salita
Hindi basta-basta maikukumpara ang magulang sa mga anak para timbangin kung sino ang mas mahalaga, dahil pareho silang mahalaga. Ang bawat isa ay may kanya-kanyang ginagampanang posisyon at kanya-kanyang kontribusyon at pangangailangan na pare-parehong mahalaga sa kabuuan ng pamilya.
