by Big Marv@BigMarvShow
In less time it takes a heart to beat, it was over, and Anderson “The Spider” Silva was still the UFC Middleweight Champion of the World. The fight took less than one round and only one kick. A front-kick that hit challenger, Vitor Belfort right on the jaw. It came in lightening quick, struck like thunder, with pinpoint accuracy knocking him out cold. During post-fight interviews, Silva said he learned the kick from one of his corner men. That corner man happens to be Steven Segal. Yes. The pony-tail sporting, martial arts movie star. THAT Steven Segal.
On December 16, 2010, World Extreme Cagefighting held their final event before merging with the UFC. The Main Event had Ben Henderson defending his Lightweight Championship against Anthony Pettis. Pettis lived up to his moniker “Showtime” by doing a Matrix style, walk-up-and-hop-off-the-wall kick knocking down Henderson. Yet another Hollywood-style kick that would have Keanu Reeves saying “Whoa.”
These two moments in the history of kicking had me thinking. What other moments in kung-fu movies would be awesome if brought to life inside the Octagon. Here are my Top Five Hollywood Martial Arts moves and who I think can make them a reality in the UFC:
5) Jean-Claude Van Damme Splits. In 97% of Van Damme movies, you’ll see two things. One is an awkwardly misplaced love scene, and two is him doing the splits.
Who Can Do This? Georges St. Pierre. He’s the most athletic fighter in MMA and he’s got that accent too!
4) Gymkata. In 1985, American Olympian, Kurt Thomas starred as a Gymnast who combined his skills with ninjitsu to fight evil ninjas. Yes, it is every bit as awesome as it sounds.
Who Can Do This? Anthony Pettis. I already talked about “Showtime” above. The guy moves like Spider-Man. He can totally do a few flip kicks.
3) Drunken Boxing. Jackie Chan’s cult classic, Legend of the Drunken Master, has him bobbing and wobbling in the most unorthodox fighting style.
Who Can Do This? Keith Jardine. He’s Mr. Unorthodox and he needs something new in his arsenal after losing his last five fights.
2) Five Pointed Palm Exploding Heart. This was the cool ending of Kill Bill vol. 2. However, the touch of death would be too much for the Cage, so let’s make it the Five Pointed Palm Exploding Shoulder instead.
Who Can Do This? Miesha Tate. She’s an attractive kick-butt woman, just like Uma Thurman and she fights for the Strikeforce Woman’s 135-pound championship on March 5.
1) The Crane Kick. In the original Karate Kid, Daniel-san used this kick he learned from Mr. Miyagi to win the fight and the tournament.
Who Can Do This? Jon “Bones” Jones. After his thrashing of Ryan Bader at UFC 126, I’m convinced he can do anything he wants in a fight. Though, his next fight is for the UFC Light Heavyweight Championship, and I wouldn’t recommend you mess around with a fighter the caliber of champion Marico “Shogun” Hua.