To Be or Not To Be Tolerant

To Be or Not To Be Tolerant

(On Dealing with Disagreements)

Sa kasulukuyang panahon, maraming tao ang regular na laman ng social media na gaya ng Facebook, masigasig na naglalahad ng kani-kanilang kasiyahan, mga hinaing at sari-saring personal na problema, mga papuri sa mga kaibigan at mahal sa buhay, mga litrato ng mga napasyalan at mga pagkain, at pati na rin mga angal sa gobyerno at pasaring sa mga taong kanilang kinaiinisan. Lakas-loob at buong tapang nilang isinisiwalat ang lahat ng ito. Wala namang masama r’yan.

The repercussion of expressing one’s view publicly, whether on one’s Facebook wall or on any other places in the social media world, is you express not only your strengths but also your weaknesses. You expose your biases, your tendencies, your mistakes, your intelligence, and even your foolishness. In the long run, you reveal your true self.

And because not everything that you say and believe in will be shared by or agreed upon by all your friends, acquaintances, and especially strangers, you will definitely encounter counterviews, countercomments, counterarguments, or even ridicule; worse, some will even attack you personally.

You should be prepared for them. You should anticipate them. You should be level-headed. You should not get piqued easily.

After all, social media is also real life; you just have to deal with it.

And in life, that is how we deal with disagreements–we stand by our own principles with conviction, but we also try to be flexible, openminded, perceptive, and considerate; and then we listen, we consider, we reconsider, we modify our positions whenever necessary, and ultimately we change for the better and then move on without bitterness nor regrets.

We cannot just tell people to shut up or stop talking with us; or discourage them from expressing their sides after having provoked, engaged, or interested them with our ideas and stories in the first place.

But if you really could not manage opposition, disagreement, disapproval, more so counterattack, then don’t let people whose opinions differ from yours enter your door–be it on Facebook or real life.

You either tolerate them or simply kick them out.

But you could not just rant all you want and not expect reactions. For every action there’s a likely reaction, and that’s inevitable. Deal with them, and learn from them.

As far as I’m concerned, I tolerate people’s verbal outpourings–be they dramatic, morbid, sarcastic, funny, corny, stupid, or full of grammatical blunders. My only primary condition: Don’t extend such outbursts into actual physical harm or violence.

I don’t mind counterarguments. Heck, I don’t mind even counterattacks! I love the art of literary war, in which I fight using the power of the mind, words, and knowledge. Because, through passionate discussions I force myself to think, to analyze, and to become a better and wiser person.

So, to all my Facebook friends, I welcome all your opinions, be they in congruence or intersectional with mine. Just be prepared also with your strategic counterattack. I wield and angle my literary sword mathematically and seriously.

Remember, “A wise person will learn something even from a fool, whereas a fool will not learn anything even from a wise person.”

Sa Madaling Salita

Bawat tao ay may karapatang maghayag nang may kalayaan. Subalit kung ilalahad ang buong pagkatao e dapat maging handa rin sa mga posibleng komento at reaksyong matatanggap mula sa ibang tao. Wag maging pikon. Ganyan naman kahit ang totoong buhay. Kailangang matibay ang paninindigan at ang kalooban. Nararapat na harapin nang maayos kahit ang mga hindi umaayon sa iyong kagustuhan. Lalo na ngayong Kapaskuhan—panahon ng pagninilay at pagtatapos ng panibagong taon—e panahon din upang kilalaning muli an gating mga sarili. Ipagpatuloy ang mabubuting gawa. Itigil at iwaksi ang masasama.